We all have our demons, what are yours?
Social media is boastful and narcissistic. We use it to flaunt our accomplishments and seek the praise of our peers. We use it to show how awesome our lives are. We use it to distract ourselves from the problems others don’t realize we’re dealing with.
These days it feels like everyone wants to share what’s good, but no one wants to share what isn’t. We hide behind our accomplishments, too scared or ashamed to share our real problems with the world.
Where’s the vulnerability? Where’s the struggle? Where’s the hardship?
In our hurry to “one up” each other we’ve become resistant to sharing our hardships and struggles with each other. We keep our problems to ourselves, instead of seeking out the help we need.
But if you think about it, what’s the best thing to do when you have a problem?
Share it with someone and ask for help!
I don’t know about you, but whenever I have a problem, I ask someone for help. Usually a family member or close friend. Someone who’s willing to listen to me and not judge. Someone who, when I need it, can provide advice on what I can do next.
So what do I propose? Share your problems with the world!
Open yourself up, be vulnerable. Tell people what you’re struggling with, so that we can help each other.
Why do I propose this? Because everyone is dealing with their own demons. Everyone has their struggle.
A core tenet of Buddhism is the only certainty we have in life is suffering. Pleasure isn’t guaranteed in life, but everyone suffers in some way, shape, or form.
This might seem pessimistic, but it is a very powerful truth and reality of life. If suffering is an inevitability, then it’s how we respond to our suffering that matters most. If we can teach ourselves how to handle and overcome suffering, then we can handle anything in life. If you can remain equanimous when life is at it’s worst, then there’s nothing that can shake you.
Moreover, if everyone has their own struggle, then struggle is actually what brings us closer together. Shared adversity is what bonds us and forges deep relationships.
Why is this the case? Because you discover that you’re not the only one.
You never know how sharing your own struggle can help someone else. Whenever you post a problem of your own, I guarantee that there is someone else out there who reads it and says, “Hey I’m struggling with that too! It’s good to know I’m not the only one.”
It’s good to know you’re not the only one. It’s good to know that there are other people out there who are dealing with the same problems and working hard every day to get through it. It’s good to know that other people have overcome it, and there is a group of people out there who can help you do the same.
If we can learn to share our struggles with each other, we can learn to bond over our shared adversity and overcome our individual problems. If we can learn to be open and honest with each other, we can build meaningful relationships of trust and equality.
I propose that you share your struggles. Be vulnerable. Open yourself up to the world. You will realize that rather than scrutiny and ridicule, the world will open up and love you. You will feel more connected to society than ever before.
To show that I practice what I preach, here’s what I’m currently struggling with. Here’s what’s been going wrong in my life.
In the last month my website that drives my business has crashed, my co-founder quit the company, and the firm I outsource 80% of my work to decided to drop me as a client. The code on my website was written so poorly that I can’t fix the problems and now need to rebuild everything from scratch. On top of this, my business isn’t generating enough business. I’m running out of money quickly, and can’t afford to buy my own place so I live at home with my parents. I have lower back issues and my body is constantly in pain no matter how well I eat or exercise. I grind my teeth in my sleep because of stress.
All in all though, life is pretty damn good so I can’t complain too much 😃 Just wanted to share that no matter how rosy life might seem on the surface, everyone’s dealing with something 😉